Hard, particularly lifes hard, is relative. Your hard, my hard, their hard, is not the same, but whatever the case is, it is often that the quote above is very true.
I have been spending a lot of my time lately, call it reflection or the pause before the big jump, thinking about the people in my life that I have come a long way with, and while the list may not be as long as forever, there are a handful of people I can point to and that I know I will always be able to point to. But this hasn't always been the case. We always come across people, some we may even dare to call best friends, that come in to our life and make us feel or think we have found the real meaning of lifelong, but then something happens, big, small or nothing at all that makes you realise "we can count on so few people to walk that hard way with us"
.... and this has happened to me time and time again, I've pretty much ditched the term best friend, even though Lord knows I have some of the best, and I learnt a valuable lesson in reason, season or a lifetime.
Maybe it is something to do with growing up, in fact scratch that, it has everything to do with growing up. The more you do it, the fewer friends you do it with. Your priorities change, and what you start to look for in friendships have changed along with them. So when I reflect on the almost friendships and the lost ones too, I realise why they may not be such a bad thing.
I only want a few people to walk the hard way with me, and there are only a few people that I want to walk the hard way with. While I may not believe in 'no new friends' I believe that when you find the friends that encourage you, support you, believe in you, make you a better person, and generally make lifes hards easier then keep that circle tight.
We sometimes fool ourselves in thinking that we need so many people around us to not feel lonely, but there is a power in only having a few friends. A power in not having to count on so many people, because really if we are being honest, people often cannot be counted on to be counted on.
Kimberly Kardashian recently gave birth to a no name baby girl that was expected in July, and ever since this glorious day in entertainment, I have been prowling all sorts of gossip blogs and so on just to find out anything that I can about this child. It's really shameful, I know. I am almost certain when it is Kate Middleton's turn I will be none the wiser. But any way, I love babies, so maybe and just maybe, this is what my obsession is about. I am quite excited for Kim, as if it were one of my friends, so if I could, I would say these things to say to her
1) You must be glad it's all over
I am not a mother, so I don't know what it's like to carry a person for 9 months, especially during those last few months, and maybe the paps just caught you on really bad days, but you looked like your life has never sucked more, and it couldn't have been easier with the whole world weighing in on your life. I know I did a time or two, especially during the MET Gala, oh, and when you wore those shoes too small for your feet. You didn't make it hard for us to be honest, but if I am being real, no one deserves that kind of bashing, even if they did sign up for it. So now that the pregnancy has come to an end I can imagine you must be relieved, you are only human after all, and choosing to live your life in front of the cameras and at the mercy of peoples heavy opinions doesn't change that. So, even though you might still end up on worst dress lists and appear on magazines covers for having an ass too fat, (you know it's not going to end) it's not going to be because of something you couldn't control.
2) Be more like Kourtney
While it must have been super annoying to have people compare your pregnancy to your sisters, there are some things you might just want to learn from her, and the most important one of all is to not hide your baby from us. Can you not see how in love we are with Mason, and Penelope's fat cheeks? I'm almost positive we will adore K..... (since you don't want to give us a name yet) and see, this is what I am taking about, it's been 5 days now and we still don't have a baby name. It's just a name Kim, and even Beyonce who is better at this game than you told us right off the bat what her little one was called. So please, just give us a name.
Lastly...
3) You are stronger than we gave you credit for
Over the years people have come to know you as one thing, a sex symbol. And your pregnancy, it kind of started to tear at that image, and not so nicely. You came under attack for all the wrong reasons, almost like it was unheard of for a pregnant lady to get fat. But in the midst of it all you seemed put together, you were not going to let people dictate who Kim should be, but instead show people that they can talk all they want to but this is who Kim is. And maybe I am comparing you to the likes of me, who would have probably chosen to take a nine month vacation in a cave, but it was nice to see. You did something that was clearly hard for you, in the open, all day everyday, and didn't allow people to dictate that. Go you!
Rumour has it... The talented Wade joined one of KZN's
biggest radio stations Gagasi 99.5. Huge claps and round of applause!!!
I've only ever heard of him in passing, but most of you avid followers of South African local entertainment would have seen Wade, who is also well known as "Skhokho" or
"The Zulu White boy", on local TV station SABC1's comedy series Abomzala. This professional performer, presenter and socialite is not new to the radio airwaves though, he has once worked on former Durban radio station DYR (Durban Youth
Radio) with the likes of ECR's Zabalazile
Simbine, Ukhozi Fm's Sthandwa Nzuza
and Brand Architect Boni Xaba. Wade was also one of the LIVE presenter search Top 4 finalists competing with the likes of Luthando "Loot love" Soshaand Nomuzi "Nomoozlie" Mabena.
And according to him, he is very excited to be back on radio, and of course would like to thank the man above his friends and Gagasi FM for believing in him. Congratulations Wade!
You can catch Wade producing the Afternoon Show Off Monday to Friday between
3-6pm on Gagasi 99.5. If you're around KZN or simply stream LIVE via
www.gagasiradio.fm. I'm definitely looking forward to it!
These words are something I am going to hold on to from now on. Life and our parents and our teachers, they all teach us that nothing worth it is easy, and seeing this was a friendly reminder! Sometimes we all get stuck in wanting to get 'there', that we forget what made us want to get there in the first place... So for all my creative friends, you writers, poets, photographers, fashion heads, etc... This one is for you.
Happy Mothers Day to all you beautiful mothers out there. I can't imagine it being an easy job, but I can imagine it being the most rewarding! I can't wait until I am a mother myself and can get to experience the joys of motherhood, but till then I'm going to let y'all handle business.
I'm excited to bring you this weeks guest blogger because it is a little different, even for me. My friend Sandy, who I present to you this week, is a social media expert and loves, eats, breathes, and sleeps everything social media, and for good reason. Today he shares with us some tips and tricks on becoming a great guest blogger. I thought this would be a good fit for today because a lot of people recently have asked me about being a guest blogger, what they would need to do, what I want them to do, etc... and there are some things that come with giving your article to be submitted on another site, and Sandy explains it here in this weeks guest post. For more you can visit his blog here
How to become a great Guest Blogger
Hi guys, I'm Sandile Nene, better known as Sandy. I am 20 years old, I love, blogging, tweeting and reading, and today I want to share with you some Guest Blogger tips that I found.
1) Search for blogs relevant to your audience. It doesn't have to be your exact niche, but you will want to only guest post on blogs that
are similar to your own and that your audience relates to. This helps you
establish yourself as an expert in the field and it also helps you make great
connections.
2) Make sure the site is credible. Take time to do the
research. See if they are getting a lot of comments either on the blog or on
their social platforms. Check out their guest blogging requirements. If it
looks easy to get a post with them, then you probably don’t even want to
bother. If they have strict guidelines and measures for posting on their site,
it will mean they are more credible.
3) Build relationships. Sending out mass emails might lead
to a few guest posts, but building relationships will allow you to have places
where you can post multiple times and where you are a trusted source. This can
also lead to meeting new people through these trusted relationships.
4) Think outside the box. People are not going to want to
publish or read something that has been done a million times. If your article
is new and unique it is more likely to get posted by the big blogs. Read other
blogs and do keyword research to get your ideas flowing.
5) Keep up with trends. Set up Google alerts for specific
keywords and have your Google reader on hand every day. If you are on top of
the trends you will be able to provide guest posts that are up to date and
relevant to other readers.
By doing these things you are making sure that you stand out from others and keep your articles interesting and fresh.
It's Mothers Day coming up, and while I was scrawling the Internet for Mothers Day ideas, because you know, since the invention of Google we don't really have minds of our own. I came across the sweetest thing, and speaking of Google they take the credit on this one. They recently made a video clip called 'Here is to all the Mom's' in celebration of Mothers Day. It captures such adorable moments between mother and child and I just had to share.
Just a little update to let you know I am on bloglovin' now, so you can follow my blog through there as well. Got a little heads up from a fellow blogger that Google connect will be shutting down in July, so I needed to act quick. I'm not too sure how far these rumours are true, you know I heard some Facebook shutting down on the 7th of May rumours and a few Twitter rumours too, so maybe the social networking gurus are trying to play a trick or two on us, but those of you who also want to switch quick, and don't want to leave anything to chance, then check out bloglovin' too! You will definitely find me on there under Lu3Lus Crossing.
So like, the selfie, we all do it, no matter how hard we try not to turn the front camera on and become self employed as a model and photographer, we all do it. I didn't realise till the other day how conditioned I was to seeing selfies (it's not like I don't see about ten different selfies on Instagram a day), until someone who I don't know followed me and I had to start searching through their pictures for a selfie just so I could see.
I'm not opposed to the selfie, sometimes we really do have a fabulous lip colour or hairstyle that we would like to show off our friends to see. I do it all the time too. I may not post all of them to social networks but anybody going through my phone is going to think I am absolutely obsessed with myself. It's fun.. camera on, lift, pout, flash, next one; camera on, lift, smile, flash, next one; camera on, lift, stare into nothingness, flash.
At first every time I even thought of taking a selfie I felt like a vampire trying to walk in the sun. Felt like I was going to get burned for it, because we've all heard what they had to say about the selfie. Don't do it. They say that this (especially posting them online in lure of getting above 10 likes, just me?) is pure narcissism. And I realise that after saying the whole 10 likes thing, maybe just maybe they have point. But also when we completely ignore this point they are trying to make, they really don't have a point. When I take a selfie, I am either completely bored out of my mind, I have no one to take this photo of me and I have just GOT to show you my new bangs (I really don't) or I honestly just like the way I look and my Instagram is my Instagram after all, so naturally I just upload it, crop it, filter it, caption it and post it. How does this make me a narcissist? It's basically just a whole bunch of, it's my account, I can do whatever I want with it, it's for me not you anyway.
But at the same time
I don't really believe this whole, I'm posting this for myself stuff that we like to feed ourselves sometimes. Yes I'm posting up the picture because I want to, the application does say 'upload picture' any way but ultimately the I-don't-care-what-no-one-thinks thing is a little hmm. My logic is, if we put anything online it becomes everybody's, it's not just for ourselves otherwise it wouldn't be up there.Would you put up your latest diary entry online, you know, the one about the boy, your secret crush, the one who is dating your friend? No, I didn't think so. So this stuff online, is not just for ourselves. So we care a little what people think, because you had to think about it. You had to think about the right angles, filters, photo tricks and captions to be able to put your best self face forward.
But we have heard all this before right? blah blah blah selfie, blah blah blah, social approval, blah blah blah vain. And to that I say.....
You know those things, yes those things, that can turn any bad day good, put a pep in your step, keep you way occupied and make you that much happier... well yes, I have a few of these things I call my favourite things. Lately I have been indulging in quite a few, and I wanted to share with you some of my latest obsessions the things that I can't live without.
Flipboard
Can't say nothing else except for I am addicted. I spend most of my time on this app,when I am not tweeting or chatting. It has given me the excuse not to have an excuse to 'use my phone' when I see someone I do not really want to talk to, or when I find myself in awkward situations, because now I can just. I can literally stay on Flipboard days on end and only come up for air when I have been rudely interrupted.
I love that I can create my own magazine, with all the stuff that I find on the app and on the Internet. If you ever need inspiration, fresh ideas or just knowledge from people within the same 'industry' or people who have the same passions and interests as you, then this is the app for you.
I've created three magazines so far {below}, and while I am still getting the hang of being my own magazine curator, I am enjoying the hell out of this app, flip after flip.
If you are on Flipboard too, let me know, and please stop by my magazines and let me know what you think.
Vine
Another social media platform... I am beginning to wonder what social media platform I am NOT on. Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Pinterest, Keek, the list just goes on, but you name it and I am on it. Is this even healthy?
I have to say though, some of my favourite social media apps are ones you can get creative with, like Pinterest, Instagram and now Vine, I just love it.
I was introduced to it by one of my friends, and at first I hadn't a clue what to do with this thing, {not like I am much different now}, but this is app is slowly becoming one of my latest addictions. See, I am not so much a visual, that means photography and film, kind of person but the whole art interests me. So whatever chance I can get to play with one of these photo/video tools, count me in.
Joy is what I feel in my heart when I look forward to the next couple of days, weeks, months. Being engaged has changed everything for me! I haven't been one to start planning her wedding day from the day she was born, but along the way I have come across friends and people {of course I mean him} that have got me excited at the prospect of planning a wedding... My one friend is obsessed and her obsession has become my obsession, if not for the fact that she sends me every bridesmaid fabric, wedding dress design and wedding location picture out there. She and the fact that this is all real now, makes planning my wedding one of my favourite things to do lately.
Just as much as coffee addicts need their coffee to get them through the day, I need my cups of tea, and if it is vanilla I can do just about anything. I am a tea lover for sure man, even on the hottest day. I believe that you can find the answers to life at the bottom of a tea cup. Some say wine glass, I say tea cup.
Mirrors
I should probably get in line with this one.
I was pretty disappointed with the music that was coming out at the beginning of 2013, till Justin showed up. I love this song, it's everything you need in a love song and more.
Magazines & Blogs
I am a reader, I love to read, books, magazines, blogs.... I read it all. So as I heal myself with a cup of vanilla tea I like to indulge in a few magazines and blogs. Lately my favourite magazine has been ELLE UK. I have always bought the South African edition because it makes more sense to me. I'm here, it's here, perfect pair. But I recently got the UK edition and was amazed by their editorials, it wasn't the first time though, but I realised why I need to do more of it. What an amazing read.
But all in all, I love me some GRAZIA, ELLE and GLAMOUR.
And lately my favourite blogs are, Fashion Toast, Song of Style, Wendy's Look Book, and The Glamourai. These blogs make having my flipboard app that much more fun. Lot's to flip and lot's to be inspired by. It's amazing when you can get lost in a world that someone else has created for you, and enjoy your stay.
So yes, these are a few of my favourite things. What are some of yours?
